室友和室友

和平生活-“相处”

For some, you may have had a room all to yourself for as long as you can remember. 对于那些习惯分享的人, it is still an adjustment adapting to different personalities and lifestyles that may differ from yours. It may be a challenge to live cooperatively with roommates and suitemates in an area that may be smaller than your room at home. 然而, 把它看作是你十大博彩推荐排名州立大学经历的一部分, 一个了解他人的机会, 同时分享你的背景和兴趣. 你可能会发现这些努力是值得的.

与不熟悉的人交谈有时可能会很困难, 然而, 沟通是任何健康关系的关键. Be a good listener and open to compromise while asserting your own ideas and rights and you’ll probably discover that you have more in common than you thought.

帮助提示

从一开始就愿意沟通. If you have taken the opportunity to speak to your roommate(s) before you arrive on campus, you have the advantage of having exchanged information about what to bring. 你们俩都有电视机有必要吗? 你能分担冰箱等的费用吗.? You may also have shared ideas about decorating the room, style, 等. This early communication might alleviate some initial problems with room arrangements. Don’t judge your roommate based on online communities and communications.
If you haven’t already communicated with your roommate(s) prior to arriving on campus, it is a good idea to discuss ideas on possible room set-up before actually arranging the room.
Knowing that there is limited space and you may not be able to fit all the items you brought with you, 愿意妥协. 分享很重要, so be sure to have clear expectations of each other as to what items you do and do not feel comfortable sharing.
In addition to discussing some of those living space concerns right from the start, it helps to share some basic information about your backgrounds, 你来自哪里?, 你的家人, 爱好, 学术兴趣, 等.
Be proactive and honest about your feelings, while at the same time being considerate and respectful. Let your roommate(s)/suitemates know what really annoys you or makes you angry. 讨论一下你对过夜客人的看法, 酒精, 电话的使用, 管家, whether you are a morning or night person and other aspects of your personal habits.
When sharing your feelings and concerns, use I statements. For example, instead of saying, “You make me very angry,” try saying “I am very angry.” Making definitive statements allows you to own your feelings and your roommate is less apt to be defensive.
When sharing your feelings or having a disagreement it is best to share those face-to-face and not through notes, 短信或社交媒体.

It is not necessary for roommates to be the best of friends to be compatible. 处理分歧, 文化是否, 精神或生活方式可能是一个挑战, 但是积极的一面, 开放的态度, 这是一次很好的学习经历. You will more than likely find that you and your roommate(s) have quite a bit in common once you move past any differences on the surface. 如果不是, you will still have learned something valuable about how to live with someone very different from you — a skill that will serve you well in many other situations in life. Meet with your roommates and/or suitmates to complete a Roommate Agreement within one week of moving into your room. 完成后将协议副本通过电子邮件发送给您的RA. 室友协议表格.

室友权利法案

作为室友，你有权利…

Study and sleep free from undue interference (noise, stereo, guests, 等.在你的房间里.
Expect roommates will respect each other’s personal belongings.
一个干净的居住环境.
Free access to your room and its facilities without pressure from your roommate(s) to stay away frequently.
个人隐私.
有客人来, with the understanding they will be respectful of your roommate(s), suitemates or apartment mates and other residents of the floor or apartment and they will strictly adhere to the guest policy.
Be free of fear and intimidation—physical and/or emotional.
Expect reasonable cooperation in the use of room-shared appliances and a commitment to agreed-upon payment procedures for those appliances.
Be free of peer pressure or ridicule regarding your personal lifestyle choices.

应对出现的挑战

保持客观和尊重

和你的室友谈谈这个问题。. 不要对别人说闲话，也不要憋在心里.
具体表达你的感受.g. “I get angry when you do ‘y’ and ‘z,’” rather than, “You’re a jerk.” The second comment is not productive in solving the problem because it’s too personal and not specific enough.
Listen to your roommate’s perspective the same way you would want them to listen to yours.
Avoid communicating through online communities and referring to posts regarding roommate concerns and/or behaviors. Remember, face-to-face communication is the key to communicating successfully.
只要有可能，就愿意妥协.

Consult an objective outsider if you are unable to resolve issues yourselves

你的RA可以帮助调解这种情况.
A mutual friend or another person who is impartial such as your Community Director, 也可以帮忙吗.
联系调解资源中心(MRC), located in the Bohn Hall 4th Floor Office for assistance. 也可以通过以下方式联系到他们 mrc@shury2.net.
Complete a roommate contract to help guide decisions about living together.

Be sure you confirm the points upon which you have agreed

未经检查的假设也可能是有害的.
把你的协议写下来.g. “比尔晚上11点以后会戴着耳机看电视.m.” and “Sam will not turn on his radio in the morning before 8 a.m.或者，“玛丽只会让她的朋友周末留下来。.”
Be realistic about agreements you make with your roommate(s).

正式换房间将是最后的办法

Remember, a new roommate can be the source of many new problems.